N'chifukwa chiyani "Little Mary"?

Mu 1996, mkazi wosadziwika ku Rome, wotchedwa "Mary wamng'ono" (Zing'onozing'ono Maria) adayamba kulandira malo omwe amadziwika kuti "Drops of Light" (Gocce kwa Luce), omwe ofalitsa odziwika bwino a ku Italy Edizioni Segno adatulutsa ma voliyumu 10 m'mabuku, omwe adakhalapo posachedwa kuyambira 2017, ngakhale kuti mauthengawa akupitilira. Zomwe zimaperekedwa ponena za wolandirayo ndikuti iye ndi mayi wamba wamba komanso mayi yemwe amakhala muumphawi komanso wobisika. Malowa, omwe amati ndi Yesu, amakhala makamaka akatekis pa kuwerenga kwa Misa kwa tsikuli, koma nthawi zina amakhudza zochitika zakunja. Kwa iwo amene amadziŵa bwino mabuku achinsinsi a Chikatolika a m’nthaŵi yamakono, kamvekedwe kake, kamvekedwe kake, kamvekedwe kake, ndi kamvekedwe kake ka Malemba, kamafanana ndi nkhani zazitali zophunzitsa za Ambuye zopezeka m’zolemba za Luisa Piccarreta, Maria Valtorta kapena Don Ottavio Michelini.

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Mau oyamba a Drops of Light (Gocce kwa Luce) lolembedwa ndi “Mariya Wamng’ono,” monga momwe wotsogolera wake wauzimu analamula—lotembenuzidwa kuchokera ku Chitaliyana.

Awo Maria!

Mwina 28, 2020

Ndikulemba kalatayi momvera bambo anga auzimu, amene wandifunsa nthawi zambiri kuti ndifotokoze nkhani ya "Madontho a Kuwala" (Gocce kwa Luce), mwachitsanzo, momwe zidayambira.

Kodi nkhani ya "Drops of Light" ndi chiyani? Funso loyamba limene ndinadzifunsa, limene ndinadzifunsa, ndi lakuti: “N’chifukwa chiyani ndili ndi ine, Ambuye? Kodi chochitika chauzimu chimenechi chimabwera bwanji mu mtima mwanga?”

M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, ndakhala wokhoza kufotokoza izo, mmene zimathekera kwa ine, ndi mmene thandizo la Mulungu liliri.

Zinayamba chonchi. Kwa zaka zambiri zisanachitike, pambuyo pake, munganene kuti, kupezanso chikhulupiriro, kutsatira nthawi yotalikirapo ubwana wanga kenako kukumana kozama ndi munthu wa Yesu, zakhala zikuchitika kwa ine kuti, m’pemphero, pamaso pa mafano opatulika. , m’mipingo, pambali pa manda a oyera mtima, kapena pamene pemphero linali lamphamvu, lachikondi, makamaka posinkhasinkha za zinsinsi za Chisoni cha Ambuye, zolankhula za wina zikadalowa mu mtima mwanga. Linalinso yankho la mafunso anga, ndipo ndinazindikira kuti ichi chinayenera kukhala chochokera ku chinachake m’malo a mzimu.

Komabe, ndinayesetsa kuti ndisapereke kulemera kwa chodabwitsa ichi ndikuchisiya pambali, osayika kufunika kwake. Mphindi itadutsa, ndinayesa kuiwala ndikuganiza kuti ndi autosuggestion. Komabe, pambuyo pake, popeza chinapitirizabe, ndinayamba kuchilingalira, chotero ndinapita kukapempha wansembe kuti andidziwitse. Koma nditalongosola vutolo, ndinauzidwa kuti ndinali kudwala ndipo ndinayenera kupita kwa katswiri wa zantchitoyo, amene anandiuza kuti ndinali kuzunzidwa ndi mdierekezi ndipo chotero ndinafunikira madalitso ndi kuthamangitsidwa.

Ndipo ndinatsatira uphungu wa ansembe osiyanasiyana, koma palibe choipa chinatuluka - kapena m'maganizo mwanga, kapena kwa woipayo, ndipo ndinadzifunsanso ndekha kuti, "Ambuye, mukufuna chiyani kwa ine? Ngati zonsezi sizichokera kwa Inu, chotsani kwa ine. Kuwunikiridwa, ine ndikuganiza, ine ndiye anayamba kucheza, kulankhula ndi Yesu mu Ukaristia, ndipo ine ndinati, "Pano mu Ukaristia pali Mulungu yekha, ndipo palibe chinyengo." Ndipo pomulandira Iye, ndikanati: “Ambuye, sindikumva kalikonse.

Ndipo kotero, pafupifupi osazindikira, mwachibadwa kwambiri, ndinakonzekera kumvetsera, ndikusiya mtima wanga uli chete kuti Iye akhale ndi danga lonse ndi chidwi, ndipo ndinayamba kumvetsera zokambirana zazifupi-zofanana ndi malingaliro omwe ndi mawu operekedwa mu mtima—lingaliro lolankhula: limalankhula ndipo ndimamvetsetsa ngati ndi liwu lachimuna kapena lachikazi, kaya ndi Yesu kapena nthawi zina Mayi Wathu, kapena woyera mtima. Ndi lingaliro limene limadziwonetsera lokha ndi kukonda.

Mgonero pambuyo pa Mgonero, nkhanizo zinakhala zazitali, ndipo ndinakula moyenerera kulandira, monga mwana amene poyamba amaphunzitsidwa ndi mawu aang’ono, afupiafupi, ndi amene, pamene kumvetsetsa kwawo kukukula, amakhoza kupita ku makambitsirano otalikirapo ndi athunthu.

Pa Misa Yopatulika, ndikamamvetsera Mau Oyera, mayi wosauka wachikhulupiriro chochepa, ali ndi nkhawa, akunena mkati mwanga, "Koma tinganene chiyani za mawu awa?" Komabe kumapeto kwa kuwerengako, Ambuye ayamba kale kuphunzitsa, komabe nthawi zonse amandisiya ine omasuka kuti ndimumvere Iye ndi kumulandira Iye (molingana ndi momwe ndimaganizira komanso ngati ndikufuna kumvera banja la wansembe), kapena ayi, chifukwa zitha kukhala zosatheka kwa ine chifukwa cha zochitika kapena anthu.

Mawu awa samandisiyanitsa ndi zomwe ndimakumana nazo. Misa yopatulika ikuyamba. Amalankhula ndipo ndimamvetsera, ndimachita nawo. Pokhapokha pa nthawi ya kudzipereka pamakhala bata la kupembedza. Zakhala zikuchitika kwa ine—kaŵirikaŵiri, koma osati nthaŵi zonse—kudalira pa nyengo zina, kuti zikakhala zovuta kwa ine kufika pa guwa la nsembe, kulandira Yesu, ndi powona ena akuima pamzere mwakachetechete, nthaŵi zina ndimazunzika. Ndikulimbana, ndimagwa pansi ndi mtundu wina wa ndewu, ndipo ndimayesetsa kuthamanga. Mzere womaliza wolandira Mgonero umawoneka kutali kwambiri; Ndimayesetsa kubisa kukhumudwa kwanga momwe ndingathere, nkhope yofiira ndi thukuta, monga munthu amene wagonjetsa kwambiri, ndipo ndikupereka manyazi anga kwa Ambuye. Nditafika, kumulandira Iye, ndikunena mokondwera kwa Iye, "Tinachitanso nthawi ino." Kapena, chifukwa mtunda uli wovuta kwambiri kwa ine—ngakhale utali wa mamita ochepa, ndimamuuza Iye ali kutali, “Ndithandizeni, asazindikire. Ichi ndichifukwa chake ndimakonda Misa yapakati pa sabata kuposa zikondwerero zazikulu pakati pa makamu.

Ndi kangati ndikadziuza ndekha kuti, "Ayi, osati lero, ndikhala pansi kuti ndisakumane ndi zovuta zambiri komanso zovuta," koma wina wamphamvu amandikankhira, ndimamva ngati wamantha kwa Chikondi changa. ndipo ndimapita. Ndikangotenga Mgonero, ndimamupatsa zolinga zanga, ndipo Iye amazilandira ndi kupereka madalitso Ake, kenako amayamba: “Maria Wanga. Zili ngati mvula, chigumukire chikundigwera, kutsimikizira nkhani imene inali itayamba kale pa Misa Yopatulika, kuikulitsa, kuikulitsa.

Amathira mtsinje mwa ine, umene sindingathe kuugwira. Zomwe zinalembedwa pambuyo pake ndi zokhulupirika kwa izo: mawu omwe amveka ndi awa, koma si onse. Nthaŵi zonse sindingathe kuzizindikira kotheratu popanda kulakwa monga mmene zinalankhulira kwa ine, ndipo sindikanatha kuzisunga mumtima mwanga ndi m’chikumbukiro, chikadapanda chisomo cha Mulungu kundichirikiza ndi kuzikumbukira.

Yesu mu Ukaristia amadzisintha yekha kuti agwirizane ndi zotheka ndi luso lathu la kuzindikira komanso kamvekedwe ka mapemphero, ngakhale kuti kulankhula kwake kumapitirira mu mtima, ngakhale panthawi yomwe iyenera kukhala chete ya chiyamiko. Tsoka ilo, chotsatirachi chikutsagana ndi zododometsa zambiri, kung'ung'udza kwa anthu, mawu ambiri aumunthu, ndipo palinso zilengezo za wansembe zomwe zimasokoneza. Kuti mugwire chuma choterocho ndipo musachibalalitse, muyenera kuchisinkhasinkha mkati mwanu mpaka kunyumba, kotero kuti muthe kuchilemba mokhulupirika kwambiri, ndi kuthawa mu mpingo, monga pambuyo pa Misa chirichonse—phokoso. , moni—zimakupangitsani kuiŵala, pamene kuli kwakuti Yesu akali mu mtima mwanu, waiŵalika kale.

Mulungu amadziwulula yekha mwachete, ndipo nthawi zambiri kumakhala kuzunzika kusinkhasinkha ndikukhalabe otsekeka mkati mwa ubwenzi Wake pamene pozungulira pali zododometsa ndi phokoso, ndipo munthu ayenera kulimbana, kukhala pambali, pamene m'malo mwake miyoyo yabwino nthawi zambiri imabwera kudzakusokonezani mosalekeza. kuti ndilankhule nanu. Ndi wabwino chotani nanga Ambuye amene amapereka chithandizo ndi chisomo mu zonsezi kuti ntchito yake isungidwe, yomwe cholinga chake ndi kuphunzitsa kuti, ngakhale pamwamba pa pemphero lachiyanjano ndi chiyanjano, Iye amene ali Mulungu mu chikondi ndi zolengedwa Zake kuti tonsefe ndife. , amafuna unansi ndi mgonero.

Ndakhala ndikulemba zonsezi [malo awa] kutsika kwa zaka 25 tsopano, ndikupita kunyumba pambuyo pa Misa Yopatulika pamabasi akunjenjemera, nditakhala pamasitepe a tchalitchi ndikumandiyang’anitsitsa, kubisala m’bafa kapena kuthamangira kunyumba ndikudzitsekera m’chipinda changa, kutali ndi zofuna za banja kugogoda molimbikira, kufunafuna misonkhano yanga ndi chakudya chamadzulo.

Ndalankhula kwa ine ndekha kambirimbiri, "Koma bwanji ine, Ambuye? Inu mukudziwa bwino lomwe kuti ine sindine woyera." Ndikawerenga nkhani za oyera mtima ena ndimanjenjemera ndikunena kuti: "Ndi phompho lomwe lilipo pakati pa ine ndi iwo!" Ine sindine wabwino kapena woyipa kuposa ena, ndine munthu wamba yemwe simukadazindikira chilichonse ngati mutandiyang'ana. Sindinayenere nkomwe ku izi. Sindinaphunzirepo kalikonse ponena za zinthu zoterozo kupatula katekisimu waung’ono umene ndinali nawo ndili mwana. Ndilibe [wapadera] amatanthauza: Ndimangolemba, sindigwiritsa ntchito kapena kukhala ndi makompyuta; mpaka pano, ndilibe ngakhale foni yam'manja kapena chilichonse, munganene kuti, zaukadaulo kwambiri. Ndinaŵerenga za zimene zinali kufalitsidwa, koma monga momwe anandiuza ine ndi atate wanga wauzimu.

Pali miyoyo yomwe ili yokongola kwambiri, yodzipereka kwambiri komanso yomwe ili ndi ubwino waukulu - miyoyo yoyera. Ndili ndi zolakwa zambiri. Ndimadandaulabe ngati zinthu sizikuyenda momwe ndikanafunira.

Chifukwa chiyani ine? Ndikuganiza kuti ndi chifukwa chakuti sindine munthu. Dziko silindiwona. Ndilibe chopereka, ngakhale zabwino ndi zabwino, kutanthauza kuti Mulungu yekha ndi amene angandisankhe ndikundikweza. Ndani angalembe zinthu zochuluka chonchi? Ndine wosauka ndi wosazindikira. Ndakhala mkazi wapakhomo chabe, ndipo ndikuganiza kuti Mulungu akufuna kunena kwa ine ndi kwa aliyense, “Sindinadzera iwo amene ali oyera mtima, koma ndidzera ochimwa osauka—ochepa, ofooka koma okondedwa. Iye samabwera kwa ine ndi kwa inu chifukwa ndife oyenera, koma chifukwa ndife osowa, ndipo kwa ine mwa ambiri amene amalandira zigawenga zina, amandipatsa zigamulo zina zimene amadza kudzanena kuti: “Mphatso iyi ndikupatsani inu kunena kuti ndikufuna kuchita izi ndi aliyense wa inu."

Ndimatcha izi [malo ake] buku, lomwe linayamba mu 1996 m'zaka zoyambirira za "Madontho a Kuwala," ndi Ambuye akuyambitsa nkhani ya mgwirizano ndi ubwenzi, koma yomwe akufuna kupereka kwa aliyense. Amatiyitanira kumisonkhano, kukhazikitsa ubale, chifukwa [Iye ndi] kuti tidziwane wina ndi mnzake kuti tizilankhulana kudzera mukutengapo mbali, kutanthauza kuti timalumikizana, mwachikondi.

Zokambiranazo zimangobwerezabwereza, monganso chikondi chomwe sichimatopa chimangobwerezabwereza ndipo chimakonda kunena kuti, "Ndimakukondani." Zimatanthauza kumvetsetsa momwe Iye, polowa mu kukhudzana kwa wina ndi mzake, akufuna kugonjetsa mtima wanu, ndipo pamene iwo wagonjetsedwa, pali ukwati wosatha. Ngati kukumana kumeneku sikuchitika koyamba, ngati palibe kumvetsera koyambirira, ndiye kuti palibe kutsata chiphunzitso chake. Pambuyo pake, zinthu zimachoka kwa "inu" [chimodzi] kwa inu" [zochuluka], monga [ochuluka] ana amabadwa kuchokera ku ubale wachikondi, omwe ayenera kukhala ndi chidziwitso chofanana kuti atenge nawo mbali.

Ndipo akupitiriza kuphunzitsa, kufufuza Uthenga Wabwino ndi kuulemeretsa, chifukwa, monga akunena, nzeru yaumulungu ilibe malire, monganso chidziwitso Chake. Chimene Yesu amabwera kudzanena kwa ine ndi cha aliyense: Iye amalankhulanso kwa inu, ndipo munthu aliyense ndi “Mariya wamng’ono.” Ngati tisonkhanitsa madontho ambiri ndi otere a kuwala, timawalitsa miyoyo yathu nawo.

Chimene chikuperekedwa kwa ine ndi Mulungu amene anauka ndi wopambana, koma apachikidwabe pamtanda pano, Mulungu amene amazunzidwa ndi kusakondedwa monga momwe Iye angafunire, makamaka ndi mpingo wake, ndi chifukwa chake amalankhula kwa ansembe. , kuti akhale pa ubwenzi wolimba ndi Ambuye ndiponso kuti adziwenso zimene zinachitikira mayi wa Mayi Wathu.

Sadzakhala oyera okha, koma opanga miyoyo, atate enieni a ana osawerengeka mu Mzimu, kuti abweretse kubadwa mwatsopano ku Mpingo wogwirizana ndi Mtima waumulungu wa Yesu ndi Mtima Wosasunthika wa Mariya, monga momwe amafunira.

“Madontho a Kuunika”—Mphatso ina yaikulu yachifundo yochokera kumwamba, yochokera kwa Mulungu amene satopa kulankhula ndi munthu. Osataya ndipo osangonena kuti: “Mawu awa ndi okongola chotani nanga,” kuwasiya aiwalika ndipo sanakhale ndi moyo.” Iyi ndi mphatso yake, koma—khululukireni kunyada kwanga—mkati mwake, ogwirizana ndi kulowetsedwa, sikuli kokha chimwemwe cha kuchilandira chifukwa cha zabwino zomwe chingabweretse: izi zalembedwanso ndi mwazi wa nsembe ya moyo wanga.Nthawi zambiri ndimavutika chifukwa ndimalowa m'mavuto, ndimaphimbidwa ndikuponderezedwa ndi mdani, ndipo nthawi zina ndimakhulupirira kuti izi ndizovuta. ndi chinyengo chake, ndipo ndimadzizunza ndekha, ndikupempha chikhululuko kwa Ambuye chifukwa chodzilola ndekha kulemba zinthu zoterozo.Ndipo ngati ndikanakhala wopanda ansembe ondipatsa kuwala ndi chitsimikiziro, sindikanapitiriza.Chimene chimanditonthoza ine ndi kumvera komwe kumandimasula; Ndimachita ngati utumiki.Ngati ndifunsidwa kuti ndipitirize, ndimvera ndikulemba, ndikafunsidwa kuti ndisiye, ndikanasiya.Ndilibe cholinga china koma ulemerero wa Mulungu ndi ubwino wa abale anga.

Mphatso imeneyi imawononga kusamvana ndi kusiyidwa kwa awo amene amayembekezera chikondi ndi chichirikizo kuchokera kwa iwo, makamaka chifukwa chakuti iwo ali okondedwa ake, kaya ali ndi chikhulupiriro chofanana kapena ayi. Mukadangodziwa zomwe zidatulutsidwa kunyumba, nthawi zambiri molumikizana ndi zofalitsa za “Drops of Light.” Mwezi uliwonse, pazaka zonsezi, mtengo wake wakhala wowawa, komabe wokondedwa, wokhala ndekha. wokhoza kuyima pambali pa Yesu mumkhalidwe wotere, kusonkhanitsa madontho awa a thukuta ndi mwazi wake mu Getsemane, ndine wamtengo wapatali kwambiri, zomwe zimandichititsa chisoni.” Ndithandizeni kukhala naye limodzi.

Nthawi zonse ndimanena kuti aliyense wa ife ali ndi malo ake mu ulendo wa moyo wa Yesu. Ena mu ubwana Wake woyera, ena mu ntchito ya unyamata Wake, ena mu kulalikira kwake, ndi Iye m’kusamalira ndi kuchiritsa odwala, ena opachikidwa pakama. Malo anga aang'ono ali m'munda, pafupi ndi Iye amene amandichirikiza, ndipo pamene ndinali kukhala wokhumudwa, makamaka powerenga nkhani zina za moyo wa oyera mtima, zomwe zinandichititsa kudabwa komanso kuchita mantha ndi ukulu ndi ungwiro wotero, tsopano ine ndikudabwa. nena: "Sitinabadwa tonse kuti tikhale zombo kapena sitima zapamadzi. Palinso ngalawa zazing'ono." Atate wa Kumwamba amawaonanso. Ine ndine ngalawa yaing'ono, ndipo sindikuganiza kuti ndingakhale china chirichonse, koma ngakhale ngalawa zazing'ono zimayandama ndi kuyandama pa nyanja ya Mulungu, ndipo iwonso ayenera kuyang'anizana nazo, kaya zili bata kapena pali mafunde owopsa, ndi kupanga. kuwoloka komweko; koma mabwato onse, kaya aang’ono kapena aakulu, amalunjikitsidwa ku doko limodzimodzilo la chiyero.

Ndikukhulupirira kuti izi zibweretsa zabwino ku moyo wanu, ndipo ndikukumbatirani ndi chikondi chochuluka mwa Yesu ndi Mariya. Ine ndikukupemphererani inu: mundipempherere ine.

Mary wamng'ono